THE DALLES, Ore. -- After 25 years as a paramedic, Joe Cruz called it a career.
He says what he loved most about his job was how unpredictable it was. One day he'd be at a car accident, the next day he'd be delivering a baby.
His world would forever change on September 11, 2001.
He and some other paramedics were having breakfast when the call came in for a fire in the North Tower.
Racing to what would later be known as Ground Zero, he had no idea what to expect.
"We just looked up and the hole inside of the building, lots of smoke, lots of fire," he said.
It's what he heard next is only one of the things that he can still hear.
"All of a sudden people started dropping. Lots of people. The sound of somebody hitting the ground from 100 stories is unforgettable."
Experience and instinct kicked in.
"We heard all the radio traffic, lots of things going on, it was madness." he says "They started the evacuation of people that were able to make it down. They were bringing down patients, we were treating them right there and transporting."
Again more sounds.
"We could hear the people crashing through the windows at the Trade Center. You could see everything, and we had to walk through that taking patients out."
When the second plane hit, he says they were still treating patients. He knew something was wrong.
This wasn't an airplane malfunction. What happened next surprised him. New York City came together as a tight community.
"It was thousands of people helping, it was insane."
When the towers fell, another sound.
"We heard the last transmissions from the firemen and then all of a sudden we heard the rumble. And we looked up and there it was coming down. Everything went black."
Sounds he'll never forget, visions he can't erase and nightmares he doesn't need to close his eyes to see.
For the next 17 days after 9/11, Joe Cruz would spend any time he could helping out at Ground Zero. More sounds. The locator beacons sounding off in the rubble. They belonged to the firefighters who died or were trapped in the debris.
"That's all we heard in the rubble. The eerie chirping of those here, there everywhere. That's all you heard amongst the silence," said Cruz.
Besides the sights and the sounds, Cruz said the smell was unforgettable.
"That's something that will never be erased," he said. "It was the worst the days following, when the flesh started to rot."
As the days went on his efforts went from rescue to recovery.
After a long pause, he finally answers, but he doesn't have the words to describe those days he calls hell. "I don't think it's ever sunk in."
About a year after 9/11 he wanted a fresh start. So he moved out west and took a job as a medic and also worked ski patrol on one of the Cascade Mountains. Eventually he settled down in The Dalles and married his wife, Shelly. Almost eight years after the terror attacks of 9/11 he was diagnosed with PTSD.
Cruz ended up retiring after he said was a downhill slide in his career.
Fast forward to April of 2018. Cruz was sitting in his living alone, his wife out of town. That's when his phone rang. It was the emergency operations of the New York City Fire Department. A job he gave everything to and had so many memories, good and bad.
They wanted his address, they had found something that belonged to him and wanted to send it out.
Not knowing what it was, he waited. Finally after thinking it wasn't coming, a package arrives in the mail.
"I open it up and it was my medal from 9/11 service."
For almost 17 years, it had been sitting in storage in a desk drawer collecting dust.
"It was sitting in a drawer with a list of names of some people that have not received theirs."
100 names. All heroes who had survived the attacks, served at Ground Zero on 9/11, or assisted in the recovery efforts.
Joe Cruz's medal was for his recovery efforts.
"I was really excited to learn I was getting that medal. We don't need them, but at the same time it puts a stamp on your career. We get a little recognition."
It's something he can be proud of, something he can look at knowing why he earned it.
"I'm really happy to have received this in memory of everything that we experienced in the city. It's definitely a priviledge," Cruz said.
It's a little closure for the retired paramedic, almost 17 years later.